.Xpresso Reads.: Zombie Apocalypse, are YOU ready?

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Zombie Apocalypse, are YOU ready? - Guest post

*This post is a part of Zombies Vs. Unicorns month co-hosted with Literary Exploration, YA-Aholic and YA Bookmark.

Today I'm happy to have my Team Zombie blogmate Audris over for a guest post about zombies (duh!). Don't forget to check out her blog at YA Bookmark for some more zombie fun. Have you missed any fun Zombies vs Unicorn month post? Click here to find out!

Audris is here to help us get ready for the upcoming zombocalypse. Take some notes, because it can be any day now, really!

Let’s take a minute to reflect on the question above. Zombie apocalypse, are YOU ready? Many of you might say no, or if you have watched a number of zombie movies, some of you might feel ready enough. Well, I’m here to help you guys out. The movie you MUST watch to be prepared for the zombie apocalypse is Zombieland. Yes, it may be a comedic take on the zombie apocalypse but they throw in a list of great rules to help you out. I’m going to give you guys the five rules I consider the most essential.

Please, do NOT be stingy with your bullets, I repeat, DO NOT be stingy! If there is anything you know about zombies is that they are not easy to kill. So when it comes to it, do you want to live, or be eaten? I would hope you choose live and always double tap!

The second most important rule to take from Zombieland is to ALWAYS check the back seat. I do this now and we aren’t in a zombie apocalypse. You don’t know what could be hiding there. Lurking, waiting for you to calmly get in your car and BAM attack! No sense in dying by just getting in your car. If I’m going to undoubtedly be eaten or infected by zombies I would rather it be in some intense fight…not just because I forgot to check my back seat.

Anther important rule, cardio. I'm telling you that zombies might seem slow, until you've been chased by them non stop. You want to be ready to run, there are also some fast species of zombies. So, I am truly telling you to not be lazy. I know I need to work on this one. If I run a lap around my house I'll probably drop dead.

Next, always know where your exits are. You should never, EVER go into a building without knowing how you can leave it. The zombie apocalypse is not something to be taken lightly and just skipping around with no care in the world. Be prepared for the worst case scenarios and preparedness includes signaling exits before you do anything else.

The final rule I have for you guys is enjoy the little things. After all is set and done, stop (preferably when you know you are safe) and remember the little things that bring you joy. No reason to be depressed all the time. Relax and smile every so often. Eat a twinkie :)

If you follow those five simple rules, I promise you that you will be ready for the zombie apocalypse. So now, back to the question, are you ready for the zombie apocalypse? All of your answers should be YES. If the time comes and I am being chased down by a bunch of zombies one day and I turn around and recognize all you bloggers, twitter peeps or see any zombies with a book under their arm, I will be VERY upset. Follow these rules and I will surely not see you among the masses.